It took what it took to get here…

I’m just scratching the surface. It’s all about staying healthy and taking the time to push this. It started in 2001 when I first came to Mexico City. I couldn’t stop taking photos of all the macro surfaces of colors and textures. Everything collided for me in those moments and I promised myself I would live here one day and make art. I went home and painted a mural in my bay window after years of anorexic art making.

It took what it took to get here. A year ago when I moved back to CDMX I came hell-bent on the goal of doing what I finished today in the studio. It took what it took to get here. This spot. Where the mental washed away and I realized I could do this. The breakthrough came in June after a rainstorm. I went to take a photo of this one spot and the paper had been dampened. I saw the layers below. I peeled some away. I never left my house without a spray bottle and the camera again.

The discoveries of what lay below the surface once the paper was damp lead me to this piece called “Control Fest” – Currently available framed via my shop.

It took what it took to get here. In November I tested HIV positive and in December I lost my mind. That turned to me destroying a wall in the streets of Mexico City. I had no boundary other than the need to release the emotional stress and not edit myself to make anyone else feel better about how shitty I felt. So I stripped that wall down and photographed the entire process. Then I picked up the paper and took it back to the studio. F*&& this Sh*U – I am not waiting anymore to try it. It took what it took to get here.

This is what the wall looked like after my rampage
This is what the wall looked like after my rampage

Took me a few days to get back here to write. Not sure why as I love to write, but it has not been flowing as normal. 

I guess my main point is that I can look back and see how the drama of the past 5 months has been a catalyst for pushing my work. I have always been concerned with time and having enough to reach my goals. Now I am concerned with managing energies and making sure I can get through each day. In that light I have slowed down but found I am more productive overall than I have ever been. Surprise surprise for me.